1.77

...that's our efficiency factor for today's job. Essentially it means that I get paid for a full day (or almost a full day) even though I only worked half the day.

So today's better. But how can we go from way over budget to way under budget without really putting forth any more effort than before?

My mood in the past couple of days has been better. The other night, I was talking with Tara on the phone, and she said I've sounded caustic as I've talked about my job lately. That got me thinking...first, what does caustic actually mean? Second, and this operates under the belief that that's a negative word, why am I feeling that way? Not in terms of what's going on with my job... but what's going on with me.

In a couple of months(!), I'll begin studying to be a pastor. This will be the first time in my life that I will be studying something that God has specifically asked me to study. It's exciting to be on that journey, or to be on the precipice of that journey (I'm reminded of Eustace and Jill in C.S. Lewis' The Silver Chair).. almost as if I have no idea what I'm getting into.

But I do, really. I know what pastors do (or have done, in my life); I know something of Christ's character which surely pastors must strive to wear daily. And I know that being "caustic" isn't part of that character.

If I am aligning myself with the profession of being a pastor, I must first align myself with the character of Christ. And that means putting up with poor job situations, dealing with difficult people and circumstances, and working for the best in every situation. Being angry for angriness' sake or without hope of joy is not Christ-like at all.

So in the past two days I have chosen to be joyful instead of depressed; I have prayed that God would give me strength to make it through this short-term job. And you know what? Things are just fine...really. even though the job isn't much fun sometimes.